Some amended images post tutor feedback

Life has been a bit of a roller coaster ride recently with the need to rush back to South Africa just before having to hand in my work for assessment. Anyway, I managed to amend a few images before leaving so I have decided to post a few of the amended images now.

1.) Exercise 2.9 : Black and white

Original Black and white version. My tutor made the accurate comment that the sea looked  less observed and therefore took away from the image.

Amended version: I felt that by keeping the water softer in the original pencil meant that the version stayed truer to the atmosphere of the original photograph in which the sea and the sky almost blended into one. I think the softer version is more effective then the first attempt.

2.) Assignment 2: Autumn poster

Original Autumn point of sale poster

Amended Autumn point of sale poster 

Although this is not quite finished, I think that from a composition perspective, it is an improvement on the first image. (above) Getting there!









3.) Exercise 3.5: Giving instructions

Original "Map to my house"

Amended map to my house

This image was a bit tricky to photograph because of its awkward size....learning point for me! Again, the amended version is not 100% finished but I think it is a big improvement on the 1st image thanks to the initial feedback from my tutor. I had struggled to see how to replace the saxophonist and also how to link the sea with the rest of the image. My tutor Christian suggested using the red string  to go everywhere I would suggest en brought to my house and consider including the sea in this. When I did this I immediately thought of replacing the area with the saxophonist, cakes etc which didn't really work, with extra lanes that I love walking down. The string definitely helped the west pier become a bit more united within the image. I also cut out most of the image from the original and then placed it on a flat colour, bright yellow piece of cardboard and I think that this works better then the more textured background in the original version. I am putting this down to the contrast created between the flat colour and the natural texture that is created in the rest of the image simply by virtue of the handmade paper that I used.

There are a few more touch ups to do but I'm happy with the progress that making some changes have made thus far.


4.) Assignment 3: Making a poster
For this assignment I chose to do a few versions of a poster for the band "Of Monsters and Men."
There were elements of each poster that I get worked but there were mostly elements that simply felt wrong! I was unable to put my finger on what was wrong with any of them but my tutor suggested that by limiting the colour pallet in the lino version; rethinking the version I called "northern lights"; fine-tuning the 'forest version and adding one simple colour/detail to the "stars"version. I haven' had a chance to alter the "stars" version yet but having made the changes suggested to the other posters I can see they are already more successful.

a.) Lino version:

Original Version: too many colours distracting the viewer and distracting from any focal point.Just too busy with too many colours.

 Three re-worked images:

I like the blue and green versions the most. The blue version hints at the gig being at night but I think the colours in he green version seem to stand out a little more. Either way I think all three are more successful then the original version simply by using a limited colour pallet especially in such a busy image. Great advice Christian. : ) 

b.) "Northern Lights" version:

Original version that didn't quite work done in gouache, especially the sky.

Woodcut version: more stylised and so very different but I think the simple mark making as well as limited pallet makes the information particularly stand out and in a poster this is important. Again I think it is more successful then the original image.

c.) The Forest version

Original version: main issue was that the black ink I used was too wet for the thin paper and therefore the paper tended to buckle. It also appears a little flat.

This version is probably the most similar but I still think that echoing the 'stained glass' forest colours in  the logo works better as well as the fact that I collaged black cardboard tree trunks on to the poster so there are different shades of black. perhaps the most subtle of the changes but I think that it still works better.

Although I would like to amend quite a few of the other images I have done we will see how much time allows! What this exercise has shown me is that what a big difference small changes can make and it's been wonderful having the experienced eye of my tutor to provide me with some guidance as to what to look for and therefore to amend.